Friday, May 7, 2010

Holdin on to Shit.

"If you can't remember it you don't need it, just let your mind be junky and you room clean".

My sister is sitting in the floor of her bedroom with a painters mask on mumbling to herself about all of the shit she's holding on to. There is a bag full of business cards, old report cards, and dirty pieces of paper that she is finally getting rid of. She is in the background saying "I'm happy I can be your little pitiful ass muse". That is what she is tonight.

We go through this every couple of weeks. I swear that it coincides with her Crimson Tide. She is 31 years old and feels like a complete failure at life so now I have to watch her throw away a bunch of stuff that she doesn't need but not before she looks at every single ticket stub, candy wrapper and balled up tissue. I don't know what to say. I don't understand how not being where you want to be in life ends in someone throwing away all of their things but she does this alot. I guess it's something to do to keeping yourself busy.

Some people just don't see their own worth or their own potential. Sometimes I wish that she would shut up and cut this Francis Farmer shit out. I never believed it until recently but healthy people really can drive themselves crazy and she is doing it. She isn't happily employed, even though she has a beauty license and is a very talented musician. Even though she is a kind and giving person with a sharp mind and a lot to say. She isn't married so she's a loser. She's as nutty as a squirrel turd but she will be ok. I have to go because I hear the sound of someone's mind snapping..


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